An Open Letter to an Xbox Hacker

March 15, 2012 -

Jason Helton pens an F-U letter to the guy who hijacked his Xbox Live account (and credit card) and decided to buy a bunch of crap on Xbox Live. The lover letter can be found over at Joystick Division, and might be funny until you consider what this poor guy had to do stop this interloper. For one, he probably had to cancel his credit card and try to dispute any purchases the guy made, and then he decided to simply wipe his Xbox Live account to avoid any further agitation.

Here is a choice morsel full of hatred towards the thief:

"I curse you, your gamertag, and your great grandmother! I hope you experience nothing but getting pwned until you atone for your digital sins. May your Avatar be cast into the Pit of Eternal Damnation, and may your Xbox get the Red Ring of Doom. And when you replace that Xbox, may that one get the Red Ring of Doom too...twice. And may the alternator in your car burn up, and that cheap integrated RADEON video card in your PC burn as well. And may you get Montezuma's Revenge, on your wedding day, hopefully while you are at the alter in front of your friends and family."

He goes on to say some harsher things, but the most amusing part of the rant is about the thief's purchase of Fable III on Xbox Live:

"Now that I think about it, you are a complete idiot. You tried to buy a downloadable copy of Fable 3, and while Fable 3 is a fantastic game so I'm told, you were going to pay $49.99 for it? Granted, it was not your money, but come on! The game sells at Gamestop brand new for $29.99, used for $17!!! Get off of your fat, lazy, gamertag stealing ass, get out of your mommy's basement, see some sunlight, and walk to the frakking Gamestop."

You can read the entire thing here. We wish Jason a future free of online sorrows and calamities.


Comments

Re: An Open Letter to an Xbox Hacker

You know, whilst I don't have much respect for the hacker, I also can't respect anyone who still uses the age-old stereotype that gamers and IT whizzes (hackers, programmers, etc) are pure nerds who "live in their mom's basements".

That's bullshit. I live in a perfectly good room at my parents house, thank you very much!

Ahem. Jokes aside, it is still quite tedious and annoying. It's old. I would have thought that people would have come to realise that lots of different people enjoy activities normally attributed to "nerds" who spend too much time in their rooms.

I can't take any who uses these stereotypes seriously. Once upon a time the stereotype was true (hence it's creation), but the gaming and IT industry aren't as once "taboo" as they were ("taboo" in that speaking about them in good terms could be considered social suicide in some societies).

Re: An Open Letter to an Xbox Hacker

Completely besides the actual point of the topic...

"Now that I think about it, you are a complete idiot. You tried to buy a downloadable copy of Fable 3, and while Fable 3 is a fantastic game so I'm told, you were going to pay $49.99 for it? Granted, it was not your money, but come on! The game sells at Gamestop brand new for $29.99, used for $17!!! Get off of your fat, lazy, gamertag stealing ass, get out of your mommy's basement, see some sunlight, and walk to the frakking Gamestop."

This man has a damn good point herein. Xbox Live Marketplace charges ridiculous prices for copies of games after they've been knocked off by half or more for new copies at Brick and Mortar's or even online warehouse retailers (i.e.: Amazon).

----
Papa Midnight

Re: An Open Letter to an Xbox Hacker

True, the value of the items on Xbox LIVE doesn't depreciate over time.

The value will remind constant unless permanently changed by MS and/or the publisher/developer.

A game that came out in 2006 is still $10. And an add-on for a game that came out in 2007 is still $20. This is why I do not like digital purchases.

-Mrxknown_JG-

Re: An Open Letter to an Xbox Hacker

That's not an issue with digital purchases, that's an issue with the people running the digial store being idiots.

Re: An Open Letter to an Xbox Hacker

+1 for truthiness.  They really should be watching their prices more.

 
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