Hey folks! Andrew here, wishing you a very happy 4th of July. Have fun but be safe. Be smart. Don’t be like my sister’s stupid kitten who thought a lit firecracker was a sparkly grasshopper, picked it up in her teeth and ran off with it.
Silly kitty. Anyway, may your holiday be mercifully bereft of exploding kitty face.
Okay, okay. I sprinted after her, snatched her up, yanked the firecracker out of her mouth and tossed it away. It exploded in the air.